What's Normal Behavior During Stress and Suffering?
Beyond the Darkness Can You Envision Light? Why We Expect So Much From Ourselves in Hard Times—and How to Shift That Perspective Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor who spent years in Auschwitz, famously said: “An abnormal reaction to an abnormal situation is normal behavior.” If we know that stress and extreme challenges can cause us to respond in ways we wouldn’t under ordinary circumstances, why do we still expect so much from ourselves? The Reality of Stress and Hardship During immense stress and hardship, it’s natural to: Struggle to stay on top of things. Feel more reactive or easily agitated. Experience heightened fears and worries. Have a more negative outlook. Feel hopeless, distracted, or overwhelmed. Even knowing this, many of us—including myself—expect to show up not only as our usual selves but as the very best versions of ourselves. It’s a setup for self-criticism and unnecessary pressure. For instance, I’ve heard people apologize for crying after a devastating loss. But ...